emptiness

I have been struggling with an existential crisis over these last few years. Fear of the future, being alive, death etc... Also, I have severe ocd, depression, anxiety, and derealization. I am a musician. Almost 36. Realizing now that I probably won't make a career out of it. I'm so scared for my future. It's like I feared when this day would come, but never really pictured getting to this point. If my passion in life doesn't work out and even if it does, I feel so empty. Having to grow old seems so unbearable right now.
I can't picture getting through life. My perception of life if so distorted right now. I've tried to remind myself that there are plenty of things to keep me going and it's not too late to find a new passion, but I still feel this dreadful empty feeling. Has anyone ever been through this and gotten through?

emptiness